Child alienation occurs when a child becomes estranged from one parent, typically the non-custodial parent, due to negative influence from the other parent or external factors.
This can happen intentionally or unintentionally, often resulting in significant emotional distress for both the child and the alienated parent. Unlike overt conflict, alienation can be subtle and may go unnoticed until the parent-child relationship is deeply affected.
In Singapore, where shared parental responsibility is encouraged under the Women’s Charter and the Guardianship of Infants Act, fostering a healthy co-parenting relationship is essential. However, challenges in post-divorce parenting may lead to situations where a child begins to reject one parent without valid reasons.
5 Tips to Prevent Child Alienation
Make Positive Remarks About Your Ex-Spouse
Reassure your child that both parents respect and care for each other, even if you are no longer together. This helps create a secure environment for your child and minimises feelings of conflict or divided loyalty.
Repair Negative Comments
If you unintentionally say something negative about your ex-spouse, acknowledge it and offer a corrective statement. Apologising and following up with a positive remark can prevent your child from internalising negativity towards the other parent.
Do Not Reinforce Negative Comments
If your child expresses negative opinions about your ex-spouse, avoid encouraging such views unless they indicate possible abuse, in which case professional intervention is necessary. Instead, help your child develop a balanced and fair perspective.
Encourage Parent-Child Bonding
Allow your child to spend meaningful time with your ex-spouse without guilt or pressure. Avoid statements like, “I will miss you so much while you’re with your other parent,” as this may make your child feel conflicted about enjoying time with their other parent.
Avoid Comparisons
Both parents have different strengths that contribute to a child’s development. Comparing yourself to your ex-spouse may cause unnecessary confusion for your child and could contribute to alienation over time.
Read more : Parental Alienation After Divorce
What Steps Can Be Taken if Child Alienation is Taking Place?
Legal Intervention
Singapore has introduced enhanced enforcement measures to protect parental access rights. If a parent breaches an access order, the court may require them to attend mandatory counselling or mediation to address co-parenting conflicts. Make-up access may also be granted to compensate for lost time with the child, and financial compensation may be imposed for expenses incurred due to denied access, such as prepaid travel arrangements.
For repeated violations of access orders, stricter measures will apply. The courts may impose security pledges or performance bonds to ensure compliance. In cases of continuous and unjustified denial of access, penalties such as fines or even jail terms may be imposed on the parent with care and control. Changes to the Family Justice Rules will also streamline the enforcement process, making legal recourse more efficient and cost-effective.
These reforms prioritise the child’s well-being by fostering co-parenting cooperation and holding both parents accountable for maintaining a stable, positive parent-child relationship. If you feel that child alienation is affecting your relationship with your child, or if you are concerned that you may have unintentionally contributed to alienation, seeking professional help can be beneficial.
Read more: Practical Approaches to Deal with an Uncooperative Co-Parent
Ms Gloria James is a trained Parenting Coordinator Lawyer (Family Justice Courts) with extensive experience in managing high-conflict divorce matters involving children. She can provide guidance on how to navigate such challenges while prioritising the well-being of your child.
At the free consultation stage, our Divorce Lawyers will:
- Assess if you can file for divorce in Singapore.
- Help you understand each step of the divorce process.
- Address questions & concerns related to divorce process.
- Help you explore your divorce options.
